23 June 2011

Heart of the Matter by Emily Giffin: A Review

23 June 2011

Have you ever dreamed of being a doctor's wife? Have you ever wondered why mistresses ever exist? Have you ever been at a point where you had to choose between two important persons in your life?

Heart of the matter is the kind of book which raises such questions. The story revolves around Nick, Tessa and Valerie. Nick is at the prime of his career as a surgeon while his wife Tessa quit her job as a professor in the hopes of giving more time for her family. On one hand, Valerie is a struggling single parent to Charlie who becomes the patient of Nick due to a tragic accident.

Sometimes, as we struggle in life and reach for success, we forget what really matters to us. We lose our focus because so many things bother and frustrate us. Changes come and go in our lives. When we find ourselves having a difficult time adapting to these changes, we feel that we don't belong anymore. The world we used to live in suddenly becomes distant and strange. When people change, we think that relationships can't be maintained.

This is the problem with Tessa and Nick. Changes came into their lives - Tessa resigns from her job and stays at home while Nick gets bored with the idea that all Tessa thinks about is managing the home. Things that Tessa didn't notice before gets into her skin now. It's a different environment. Nick tries to cope but he can't, He preoccupies himself with work. The he notices Valerie. The qualities that Tessa had prior to quiting her job, Nick found in Valerie.

In marriage, you're not only thinking of yourself but also of your partner. The other's mistake is also your burden. The other's happiness is shared with you. Both of you have the responsibility to make it work. There should be a balance between time for yourself and time for your family. What Tessa did was she gave all the time in the world to her family and in the process, she lost her identity.

I personally think that women should keep their job even after they get married. I used to dream of becoming a housewife but I guess so many problems can arise from that. Remember that feeling of being tired from school and you feel like you need a vacation? You get a very long vacation to spend more days at home. At first, you enjoy it so much, but then after a few days, you find it boring already. Because there's no balance. Unlike when you are in school, you always learn something new. You may get tired, but you spend time usefully. Work and play should always be equal.

Being in a relationship doesn't mean your world has to revolve around that person. Invest on the time you spend together, and cherish the moments you spend time away from each other. This way, you have something to talk about, because there is something you haven't done together. There's a little element if surprise.

So this post is getting long for a "review." (hehe) I want to share with you what my instructor told the class in one of her lectures... "Changes are good. Embrace them. It makes you appreciate the past and see the beauty of what you have now."

Love and sunshine,


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